Sleep Training: It's Time

On Saturday, I had to work the Gopher football game. A day which started with three nighttime baby wake-ups at 12am, 2am and 3am. My alarm went off at 4am and I worked an 11-hour day from 5am - 4pm. To say I was frustrated with Tory not sleeping, with life in general, is an understatement. I am so tired of running on fumes because I have a child who doesn't sleep.

Andi and I are not people who function well on no sleep. In the early weeks of pregnancy, I remember reciting reassuring words to myself on how we'd make it through the first few weeks of no-sleep parenting. I told myself, it'll only be a few weeks! I can do anything anything for a few weeks! Soon, I'll have a baby who sleeps 12 hours at night and we'll return to our normal selves.

Yeah, that never happened around here.

I will fully take responsibility for Tory's sleeping habits. I am not a fan of letting babies cry it out. I've never let her cry for more than 5 minutes because I just didn't understand how letting her get so worked up would help her fall asleep. She's also so gaggy and a few times she threw up from crying so hard. I couldn't bare to sit by and let that happen. I usually rock her to slumberland, even today, and I fall out of my chair with amazement when other parents talk about how their kids just magically sleep for naps and bedtime (it's so easy, they say!). I HATE YOU. (Just kidding). (Kind of).

So, Saturday was Andi's first big day watching Tory all by himself. We were both sort of nervous about it. I wrote him a list of foods to feed her and her naptime routine during the day. Not that he's not a capable parent, but I always take care of all feeding and naps. He sent me a text half-way through the work day to say she'd taken a three hour nap in the morning. WHAT THE HECK?!?! She's taken a three-hour nap for me exactly zero times. I didn't get it.

Later I asked him how he got her to sleep so long because seriously, this kid doesn't sleep at all for me. He said he tried to rock her to sleep a few times, but finally let her cry it out in her crib for 20 minutes before she soothed herself to sleep. She was tired, he said, so he just let her work it out by herself. Huh.

At that moment, I hit a wall. I'm over this! I'm tired of running on empty because I'm not getting enough sleep. At a year old, Tory really should be sleeping through the night. At most, she shouldn't need me (and only me - no one else) to comfort her. I decided it's time for sleep training.

Without sounding cold, I decided to go cold turkey. I rocked her to sleep last night as per usual and laid her down to sleep in her crib. If she woke up 20 minutes later (which is pretty standard), I would let her cry it out without going back in there. She didn't. At 2:00am, Tory cried out from her nursery and I listened and waited. At 15 minutes into her wake-up (not necessarily a meltdown by the way, but a constant fussing), I told Andi to put in earplugs if he like because I was committed to letting her soothe herself to sleep. At 3:00am, Tory was finally quiet. I was proud of myself for sticking to my guns. She finally figured it out. Unfortunately, I was wide awake but this will get easier, right?

Today during both naps, I rocked Tory to sleep and laid her down in her crib. She woke up both times and I normally would've picked her back up and rocked her back to sleep again. Today, I simply walked away and shut the door. She wasn't happy and she screamed when I left, but fell asleep minutes later and slept for 1 1/2 hours each time. I'm shocked and so happy.

I know there are various methods of Cry It Out and some offer a softer method of entering back into the room to offer reassurance. I see how this method might be a good option for a smaller child, but I think Tory's old enough to realize she's not abandoned. The kid's been playing me for MONTHS and I'm finally ready for both of us to move onto the next stage. She's a smart cookie and perfectly capable of soothing herself to sleep (as shown the last two days). Here's hoping our second night of CIO goes smoothly and my little girl will be on her way to sleeping through the night from here on out.