Daredevil Diner

My husband's one of the smartest people I know, but he makes the dumbest decisions when it comes to food. During one of our first trips together in Mazatlan, Mexico, I nearly had a heart attack when he consumed street tacos sold out of a pickup truck in a dirty alley. Did I eat the sketchy street tacos? No. Did he have a killer stomach ache a few hours later? Yes.

In route to our wedding, our photographer documented my husband at a gas station buying a Choco Taco and a corn dog. Is consuming gas station junk food minutes before making one of the biggest decisions of your life a good idea? Probably not the best food for a nervous stomach.

A few weekends ago, we hopped in the car on a Friday night and headed to our Wisconsin cabin. We ate dinner at home before we left, just some tortellini tossed in olive oil and salt and pepper. I guess the pasta must have been in the fridge a few days too long because about 20 minutes into our drive, I almost pooped my pants! I pleaded with Andi to please find a gas station, quick! A few minutes later when I returned to the car, Andi rushed to the bathroom himself. I tell you this story not because we ate something wild and crazy that caused stomach discomfort, but because we laughed for an hour afterwards recounting all the crazy places my husband has experienced explosive bathroom-capades from eating sketchy food. He could write a book someday with all the funny stories of strange food he's eaten and its associated outcomes. When will he ever learn?

Apparently not anytime soon. Today he bought gas station jerky sold in a Ziploc bag. I've never even heard of green-flavored jerky.

  
But I predict a very bad ending ...