The Flub

I never thought I'd say this, but postpartum clothes wearing is 17 million times WORSE than pregnancy wear. I have absolutely nothing to wear these days. I still have 10 pounds to lose to be back to pre-pregnancy weight (14 according to my doctor's scale and seriously, is SOMEONE going to fix that scale? It always reads heavy!). Not to mention my stomach is all sorts of, well, poochy. I find it funny how I thought my stomach was poochy before I was pregnant and now I realize I was smoking crack. That was not poochy, this is poochy and come to think of it, it's not all that funny after all.

Coupled with the fact that I gave myself absolutely no wiggle room in the sizing department pre-pregnancy, I have nothing in my closet that fits. Worse than not being able to close my jeans at all, I can squeeze into them and find myself sporting a glamorous muffin-top stomach instead. It's been unseasonably warm around here lately and somewhere between the move and not buying regular clothes for a year because I was preggo, I have no shirts that aren't t-shirts. It's apparent now that 2009 was a big Target graphic tee year for me and somehow those t-shirts look very adolescent to me now that I'm 30 and a mama.

So, I'm wearing maternity leggings and tank tops like they're going out of style. Which, I guess isn't that big of deal since I'm mostly at home during the day. BUT .... along come special events like the San Diego wedding we just attended or movie premieres like the one Andi asked me to attend with him last night. Have. Nothing. To. Wear.

After a crazy amount of complaining about my situation, Andi came home early yesterday and brought me a $100 Target gift card. "Go shopping" he said, "All by yourself. I've got the baby." I'm pretty sure I was squealing out of the drive-way before he finished his sentence (oh so long ago are the days I was terrified to leave Tory for an hour or two. Wait, that was actually last week, but whatev's).

I went to Target and found a few things I liked. I even tried them on in the store which, whoa, is a pretty big deal for me. I'm usually more in the camp of buying and promising to return the rejected items only to NEVER do as planned and let the crappy purchase hang in my closet un-worn. After trying on 20 items, I found 3 I was pleased enough to purchase. Why though did someone not warn me about dressing room lights and the deadly combination of a nasty linea nigra line down my stomach and my pasty white haven't-seen-the-light-of-a-tanning-bed in 9+ months body? Geez.

While changes to my body are COMPLETELY worth it as they resulted in my beautiful baby girl, it's going to take some getting used to as I settle into my new self image. Breastfeeding melts the pounds they say, and I suppose it has (down 27 pounds since Tory's birth) but WHEN will the rest come off? And how long before I start to feel like ME again? I guess the only bright spot is winter's approach. At least I don't have to sport a bikini anytime soon ....