Today it begins

Why is it when you select a date on the calendar and remind yourself for days that on [INSERT DATE HERE], I will start eating healthy and lose those few pesky pounds that have been hanging around, and the day finally arrives (despite failed attempts of wishing that date never does come) you find yourself STARVING all day long and lingering on every last thought, aroma and feeling of food? Oh food, how you play mind games with me....

Today is exactly one month until our Maui trip. Today marks the day in which I MUST begin to lose the five or so pounds I've packed on this winter. I've been going through one of those periods in life where I feel like I MUST eat everything on my plate - even when I'm stuffed to the gils - because I somehow feel like I'll never eat anything as good as the meal in which I'm consuming (and it's not even that great but I still.keep.eating until I'm miserable). Do you ever have those times? It's like Old Man Winter telling you to fatten up because layers and layers of clothing will hide that extra buttermilk biscuit that tastes so damn good right about now.

And yet, my brain knows I need to fit into a bikini in 30 days. I'll kick myself for not losing those few measly pounds when I had the chance every single time I look at our Maui vacation photos. I must do better.

This week I'm traveling for work which will be hard for me to tame my appetite. Something about staying in hotels for work without my own means of transportation or control over my daily agenda gives me the same anxiety that I DON'T KNOW WHEN I'LL BE ABLE TO EAT AGAIN which never fails to trick my brain into stuffing myself silly at work dinners.

I tried to set myself up for success. I brought a water bottle along to refill instead of drinking so much Diet Coke. And I stuffed a few granola bars into my work bag to curve off hunger strikes. I can do this. At the end of these 30 days, I'll be laying on a sunny beach, in a bikini, with my love. It's all worth it to a woman.